What I know

I didn't realize, until someone pointed it out to me, that I have a tendency that can seem off-putting at times. In conversation, this friend mentioned to me with some curiosity that I can skip over what's been said, in my eagerness to share what I know on the topic. This can sound a lot like lecturing or "splaining," I guess, and I see now that sometimes when I do this, my connection to the person is compromised. In favor of . . . what? Looking smart? Correcting them because they are "wrong"? What?

I've had to look at this often since then, and now I find I can notice when that impulse comes up; if I can't resist, I can at least see more clearly the impact I'm having. Either way, I often become uncomfortable. In the moment, in the room, I don't want to "go away" into self-consciousness. That's just a different way of disconnecting.

What I know, what I've learned, is that some part of me desperately wants to fit in by sharing. From there, something true can flow.